Hello, welcome and thank you for reading this. Those of you that know me will know I have an amazing job in a swanky, well-known company in the exclusive 16th arrondissement of Paris – wait a minute, stop the press, she quit! She what? Has she lost her mind? Probably?!
My very close friends and family knew I was not exactly having the most positive experience at work. This was a combination of feeling like a fish out of water at first, working in an office with not much interaction with other colleagues and feeling quite on my own, having lots of down-time between events which meant there wasn’t a lot for me to do (idle hands and all that) and then the person I had the most interaction with was pretty much gaslighting me – great!
On paper it looked like the ideal job with a fab tax-free salary, loads of holidays and perks and it’s a very respected company which is really hard to get into and I had done it! I thought I had finally made it! And it wasn’t all bad. I did have some equally lovely colleagues but I didn’t get to spend a lot of time with them, and when I was offered another contract in the same department but a new team I just didn’t want it – the sense of dread and fear of not being good enough and putting myself through it all again was overwhelming – the thought of disappointing someone else and actually being told again I’m not good enough – I just couldn’t do it and had to respectfully decline. It might have been a completely different experience in the new team but I’d grown tired of constantly being in fight or flight mode, I had been fighting since day one to prove myself time and time again and felt that, maybe, this was my chance to fly??
So what next? In all honesty I have no clue. I should be terrified at this prospect but I feel weirdly the calmest my soul has felt since I can’t remember when. I’m in love the idea of going to a cooking school and mastering the classic French techniques (she says through rose-tinted glasses) but then in reality it’s really fucking expensive, it’s incredibly long hours (massive respect) and I already started my working life all over again 8 years ago when I first moved to Paris and don’t think I can stomach that again (pun intended). Though I do love to cook and learn new skills but it’s a question of how do I turn that into a job I can make money from in a way that fits my life? Or do I continue in my current field? Will the universe decide for me? Answers on a postcard please….
To keep me occupied in the mean-time I have started my blog. Here I’ll be documenting my new job search, writing about my favourite travel destinations, I’m a sucker for a new beauty product so I’ll be trying stuff out and giving my opinion on them (Sephora/Cult Beauty here I come baby!), and talking about my favourite things to do/places to eat in the city of luuurve and lights! This is something I have wanted to do for a long time but was afraid people would laugh at me or make snidey comments and think “who does she think she is??” I don’t think I’m anyone but me, Denise Wilson, and I have a voice. This is my platform to talk about life in general and to share some positivity with you all. I hope you’ll enjoy the content and if there’s anything you’d like to hear/know about then please get in touch, I’d love to hear from you.