I did a blog!!

Hello, welcome and thank you for reading this. Those of you that know me will know I have an amazing job in a swanky, well-known company in the exclusive 16th arrondissement of Paris – wait a minute, stop the press, she quit! She what? Has she lost her mind? Probably?!

My very close friends and family knew I was not exactly having the most positive experience at work. This was a combination of feeling like a fish out of water at first, working in an office with not much interaction with other colleagues and feeling quite on my own, having lots of down-time between events which meant there wasn’t a lot for me to do (idle hands and all that) and then the person I had the most interaction with was pretty much gaslighting me – great!

On paper it looked like the ideal job with a fab tax-free salary, loads of holidays and perks and it’s a very respected company which is really hard to get into and I had done it! I thought I had finally made it! And it wasn’t all bad. I did have some equally lovely colleagues but I didn’t get to spend a lot of time with them, and when I was offered another contract in the same department but a new team I just didn’t want it – the sense of dread and fear of not being good enough and putting myself through it all again was overwhelming – the thought of  disappointing someone else and actually being told again I’m not good enough – I just couldn’t do it and had to respectfully decline. It might have been a completely different experience in the new team but I’d grown tired of constantly being in fight or flight mode, I had been fighting since day one to prove myself time and time again and felt that, maybe, this was my chance to fly??

So what next? In all honesty I have no clue. I should be terrified at this prospect but I feel weirdly the calmest my soul has felt since I can’t remember when. I’m in love the idea of going to a cooking school and mastering the classic French techniques (she says through rose-tinted glasses) but then in reality it’s really fucking expensive, it’s incredibly long hours (massive respect) and I already started my working life all over again 8 years ago when I first moved to Paris and don’t think I can stomach that again (pun intended). Though I do love to cook and learn new skills but it’s a question of how do I turn that into a job I can make money from in a way that fits my life? Or do I continue in my current field? Will the universe decide for me? Answers on a postcard please….

To keep me occupied in the mean-time I have started my blog. Here I’ll be documenting my new job search, writing about my favourite travel destinations, I’m a sucker for a new beauty product so I’ll be trying stuff out and giving my opinion on them (Sephora/Cult Beauty here I come baby!), and talking about my favourite things to do/places to eat in the city of luuurve and lights! This is something I have wanted to do for a long time but was afraid people would laugh at me or make snidey comments and think “who does she think she is??” I don’t think I’m anyone but me, Denise Wilson, and I have a voice. This is my platform to talk about life in general and to share some positivity with you all. I hope you’ll enjoy the content and if there’s anything you’d like to hear/know about then please get in touch, I’d love to hear from you.

 

5 thoughts on “I did a blog!!

    1. I got my pension contributions paid back to me with interest which will cover about 3 months and then the unemployment benefits here are really good and they genuinely want to help you get into work or will even pay for retraining so there will be less coming in but enough to get by and fingers crossed it won’t be long before I’ve found a nice new job. It’s not going to be easy I know but I had to put my health first. It was much more than not leaping out of bed everyday and singing Hi Ho Hi Ho everyday, but I’m positive I made the right decision

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